{"id":217,"date":"2008-11-21T09:09:30","date_gmt":"2008-11-21T14:09:30","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.timeoff.org\/rick\/?p=217"},"modified":"2009-02-25T09:06:04","modified_gmt":"2009-02-25T14:06:04","slug":"products-that-just-shouldnt-be","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/blog.timeoff.org\/rick\/2008\/11\/21\/products-that-just-shouldnt-be\/","title":{"rendered":"Products That Just Shouldn’t Be"},"content":{"rendered":"

Some days ago we stopped at the supermarket for a couple of things. Standing in the checkout line we saw something new – Chocolate Skittles.<\/p>\n

\"Chocoate<\/a>
Chocolate Skittles<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Now, I actually like Skittles<\/a>. Especially the sour ones that are encrusted with that crystalline stuff that stimulate your taste buds not unlike a full stack of Marshalls<\/a> cranked up to 11 does to your ears. My kid, like 99% of all kids, loves that stuff, too. (An equal proportion of adults hate that taste stimulation, incidentally, which I believe is by design.)<\/p>\n

But these chocolate things? Ugh! Gave ’em to my kid. He gave ’em back. My wife refused to try ’em after watching our reaction.\u00c2\u00a0“Tastes like ass.” To say that the\u00c2\u00a0flavors in the package – S’mores, Vanilla (huh? vanilla in a ‘chocolate mix’?), Chocolate Caramel, Chocolate Pudding, Brownie Batter – seriously miss the mark is a gross understatement.<\/p>\n

Products don’t just spring into being without consideration. Somewhere in Mars there was a meeting, the result being a decision taken to bring these abominations to market. Probably a bowl or two of ’em right there on the conference table, alongside the coffee cups and water bottles. I wonder if any of the suits actually tasted ’em. Somehow I doubt it.<\/p>\n

Some years back I knew a girl that worked for Mars. She said that samples from their (rather extensive) product line were freely available in all their offices. I’ll bet the bowls of these never, ever need to be refilled.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Some days ago we stopped at the supermarket for a couple of things. Standing in the checkout line we saw something new – Chocolate Skittles. Now, I actually like Skittles. Especially the sour ones that are encrusted with that crystalline stuff that stimulate your taste buds not unlike a full stack of Marshalls cranked up … Continue reading Products That Just Shouldn’t Be<\/span> →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[4],"tags":[67,73,70],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.timeoff.org\/rick\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/217"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.timeoff.org\/rick\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.timeoff.org\/rick\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.timeoff.org\/rick\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.timeoff.org\/rick\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=217"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/blog.timeoff.org\/rick\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/217\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.timeoff.org\/rick\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=217"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.timeoff.org\/rick\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=217"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.timeoff.org\/rick\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=217"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}